The DiFalco Den

The following tidbits are just a few pieces of advice to get you started. More to come.

• Success is a journey – enjoy the ride.
• The first order of business is to define what “success” is to you. And it better not be something boring like “Have a lot of money so I can buy a bunch of things“! The sooner you realize that success is not about that, but about being a better “you” today than you were yesterday, the quicker you will start enjoying success.
• Invest in yourself:
  • Don’t look at what you are today, look at what you want to become
  • Do something that moves you forward every day. If you are not moving forward, even small increments, you are losing ground. EVERY DAY. I can’t stress this enough… EVERY DAY!
  • Find men and women who are where you want to be:
    • Meet them – be bold – successful people LOVE to give back to motivated young people who show respect and appreciation
    • Network Network Network
    • Find someone you respect and establish a mentor/mentee relationship – Do not waste their time – if they give you advice…follow the advice. If you don’t follow advice, at some point they will stop giving it.
  • Craft a profile of yourself of how you want people to see – both right now and future you
    • Own it
    • Do what it takes to move forward every day: consistency is your friend.
    • INVEST IN YOURSELF! Make a habit of doing something productive in each of the following areas every day.
      1. First of all, and most importantly – spiritually. Make sure you are growing in God’s word.

The rest are in no particular order of importance, they all take a back seat to number 1.

1. • • • Intellectually – Read books that help you develop skills. Do not neglect improving your people skills. The best habit to get into is shutting off all screens at least 1 hour before bed and read good books right before you go to sleep.
       • Physically – Being physically fit is invaluable to your success – just trust me.
       • Relationally – spend time with the people you care about.
       • Financially – make sure you pay yourself FIRST – meaning, after giving a portion of your resources back into God’s Kingdom you should always put a nice chunk away in savings. This is a big topic…too big for this list.
     • Be patient! Success takes time – give yourself that time to grow.
     • If I didn’t say it before….Take some action that moves you forward every day. EVERY DAY.
   • Build a library of resources
     • Cover letters
     • Resumes
     • Case studies
     • Job descriptions
     • Profile resources – like images, bios, summaries, etc. of yourself
     • Anything that can help you later

Relax with it

• Seriously, relax with it. Have fun along the way. You are a great person, you have what it takes.
• Continue to focus on what God has given you and how He sees you
• Remember the Holy Spirit is your secret weapon.

BE BOLD

• Learn to enjoy networking
• LinkedIn can be your best friend
• If you are intimidated to reach out to someone you respect because they are “so far ahead of me“…put yourself in their shoes. Think about it – if you were a successful leader, and a young, up-and-coming, respectful young person was asking you for advice…how would you feel? How would you react?
• Trust me on this, the fear of “putting yourself out there” is TOTALLY FABRICATED BY THE ENEMY! I know because I HAD IT TOO!
• Smile when you are talking on the phone – it comes through.
• If you are in an important conversation, like an interview or just meeting someone you want to make a connection with, and you are trying to get a thought out but are struggling for the words
  • DO NOT GET FRUSTRATED
  • Do not get embarrassed
  • Pause, take a breath – look them in the eye and tell them you need a minute
  • Measure your words – meaning after you gather your thoughts be sure your response is addressing the question at hand or making the point you are trying to make.
  • If after a short time you don’t know how to answer, THAT IS OK! Simply tell the person “I Don’t Know” and if the situation warrants, tell them you can get back to them once you have a chance to find out the answer.

Learn to be proactive

• Remember the main thing? Always know what is going on around you.
• Learn to be the best “you” you can be – and get a little better each day.
• Listen and pay attention – practice active listening
• Ask questions.

7 TED Talks

The Paradox of Choice by Barry Schwartz

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Proverbs 26:4-5 NLT
[4] Don’t answer the foolish arguments of fools, or you will become as foolish as they are. [5] Be sure to answer the foolish arguments of fools, or they will become wise in their own estimation.

The futility of trying to impart wisdom to a fool is the basis of Proverbs 26:4-5, which tell us how to answer a fool. These seemingly contradictory verses are actually a common form of parallelism found in the Old Testament, where one idea builds upon another. Verse 4 warns against arguing with a fool on his own terms, lest we stoop to his level and become as foolish as he is. Because he despises wisdom and correction, the fool will not listen to wise reason and will try to draw us into his type of argument, whether it is by using deceit, scoffing at our wisdom, or becoming angry and abusive. If we allow him to draw us into this type of discourse, we are answering him “according to his folly” in the sense of becoming like him.

The phrase “according to his folly” in verse 5, on the other hand, tells us that there are times when a fool has to be addressed so that his foolishness will not go unchallenged. In this sense answering him according to his folly means to expose the foolishness of his words, rebuking him on the basis of his folly so he will see the idiocy of his words and reasoning. Our “answer” in this case is to be one of reproof, showing him the truth so he might see the foolishness of his words in the light of reason. Even though he will most likely despise and reject the wisdom offered to him, we are to make the attempt, both for the sake of the truth which is always to be declared, and for the sake of those listening, that they may see the difference between wisdom and folly and be instructed.

Whether we use the principle of verse 4 and deal with a fool by ignoring him, or obey verse 5 and reprove a fool depends on the situation. In matters of insignificance, it’s probably better to disregard him. In more important areas, such as when a fool denies the existence of God (Psalm 14:1), verse 5 tells us to respond to his foolishness with words of rebuke and instruction. To let a fool speak his nonsense without reproof encourages him to remain wise in his own eyes and possibly gives credibility to his folly in the eyes of others.